The Jazzy Vixen: July 2013

Gold Reef City with my old Tsogo Sun team

Zandi and I

As we enter…

Lefa and the Ntate Silver

Akshay

Musa

Hazel my Haziey Boo

Lefa and I Red heart

The team

Sowetan Toilets. Yummy yum-yum

Zandi, Hazel & Amelia

This moment right here is the face of sheer regret and thing liking. Stru!

The struggle to write - Vee Makaba

Seems as if words have become hard to remember
Like a needle lost in the dunes of the desert
I struggle to find my poetic self
My imaginative eye has lost its sight.

The pen that empowered me now cripples my hand
The ink well of wonder is drier than the sex life of a nun
I no longer have the lust to put quill to parchment in a moment of passionate verbal diarrhoea
The books which made me come alive now feel like a death trap
Lyrics have forsaken me.

I no longer wish to hear my fellow poets spit life

I’d rather spend my days listening to phones ring and bitches howl
My stress proving less demanding than my poetry
I have betrayed my gift

Poetry, I promise to find you

As soon as my ears are unblocked and my heart thaws.
I will scribble my verbals in honour of you
I will turn on the music
I will be your bride once again and you will be my therapy.

I will pen again.

This I assure you
because I love you

Yo Mama jokes

Nothing funnier than a good "Yo mama" joke. Here are some of my faves:

Yo mama is so poor, she watches tv with one eye to save energy

Yo mama is so poor, her dog gives her its leftovers

Yo mama is so poor, the rainbows in her neighbourhood are black and white

Yo mama is so stupid, she though mood swings was a mew ride at Disneyland

Yo mama is so stupid, she thought Chris Rock was a new type of crack

Yo mama is so stupid, she got locked in a mattress store and slept on the floor

Yo mama is so old, she owes Moses a Rand

Yo mama is so old, her first christmas was THE first christmas

Yo mama is so old, her high year book was printed on a rock

Yo mama is so ugly, she went to the zoo and the animals pointed at her

Yo mama is so ugly, your grandma threw her on the street and got charged with littering

Yo mama is so ugly, her birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory

Yo mama is so greasy, her freckles slipped of her face

Zolile Hlombe Makaba 05.05.58–09.08.96

This is the man whose seed helped create the wonderful being that is me. Unfortunately, he died when I was 5 and life without him has been incredibly hard but I’m grateful for the memories. I don't know him very well but from what I hear, he is the reason I’m so darn kooky. Wherever his spirit is, I hope he knows that I’m grateful I got his nose and personality traits.
Tata, I love you.

Moments

This is a picture of me and my youngest nephew Kwakhanya. Every time I see this picture, my womb jumps with excitement. Makes my desire to be a mother burn hotter and brighter than before. I’m the broodiest hen right now.
I long for such moments with my kids. I’d love to hold my baby like this and watch him sleep. My own little creation, sound asleep in my arms. I sit and dream about the kind of child I’ll have. Will it be a little boy or girl? Will s/he have my eyes? Will s/he be short or tall? Will s/he be one of those adorable laughing babies?
Passing the baby section of any store just warms my heart. Breaks it too. Those cute little socks and hats. The pinks, yellows, whites, greens and blues. The adorable baby animals on the babygrows. So damn beautiful that I just wanna burst into tears.
Someday my turn will come and I’ll be mommy. I have so much love for my future children. wherever they are, I hope they know that.
Until that day, I’ll settle for moments like this. Red heart

Cyanide and Happiness

Some of the funniest comics ever! LOVE LOVE LOVE!!! Visit http://www.explosm.net/comics/3245/ for more comics. Laughing out loud Rolling on the floor laughing

Taste of Christmas (Dec 2012)

my first food and drink “expo”. Shemi, Sihle and I had a whale of a time. Discovered some amazing products .

Our first taste of choc-chilli Patron. It was nice but I didn't enjoy it. I’m not a fan of tequila and the promoter girl was a bit of a Rudy McRudepants.

These two were our best friends! We tasted so many different wines and champagnes. I learnt so much from them (hence my love for shiraz). They were the funniest people we came across.